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November 2nd, 2004
01:34 am
Today was indifferent. Work
was really boring and long. I guess they just changed up the
evening times during the weekdays to 12. This is a waste.
Nobody comes in after 10:30. So we just sat around and did
nothing for an hour. One thing happened that inlightened my
day. I strolled over to Barned & Nobles on my break from work
and saw one of these girls who comes into my work a lot. She
actually works right next to me. She's a really cool girl from
New Jersey. She's into art and fashion design. I got her
number and I'll give her a ring later this week.
I forgot what I was going to say.
I think I was going to talk about something else. I forgot.
Hmm....I'm tired. Vote Tommorow Fools! If you know what's
good for you. Just vote. It's hip and you will feel
cooler. Trust me. Plus you can hit on the ladies at the
front desk that run the voting stands. There are some hot old
fems there, I tell you what.
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October 28th, 2004
01:25 am
Jim Carrey is awesome. Respect him. Love him. Despise him cause he's hairy.
![]() ![]() 
But most of all, realize that he is one of the most talented actors to
grace our society. Most would say he's just a comic
genious. I say he is a living legend.
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October 20th, 2004
02:32 am
I havn't figured out why my links wont post up on here, but you need to
get Mozilla if you aren't seeing my pics. Mozilla is way better
then stupid Internet Explorer. Trust me. I have been using
it forever and it owns Explorer. Built in pop-up blockers and
everything. The works.
Here is the site to it. Its 100% free.
http://www.mozilla.org/
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October 15th, 2004
02:44 am
Tonight was unusual. My bro came
in this morning and I tried showing him a good time. The
afternoon sucked ass, but the events that followed were
unforgettable. I went down to Westwoods (UCLA area) with my bro
and we went to Stan's Donuts to pick ourselves up something to munch
on. They have the best donuts in the world. We split up
this reeses peanut butter donut that had a layer of peanut butter in
the middle and on the outside a chocalate glaze topped with chocolate
chips. So sick bra. Then we waited for Mike to come
down. We went to the huka bar. Let me tell you about these
huka bars. I guess this is a big part of the Middle East Indian
culture. They are getting popular these days, but basically you
go to this Indian restaurant. Order some food, some drinks, and
how about some delicious tabacco? But of course. We got
rose flavor. It tastes like a flower of deliciousness in your
mouth and you smoke this with a huka. Intense? Yes.
It was a blast. For a unique experience I highly recommend you
guys go out and try it. There is one in Denver and it's a lot
cheaper or at least my brother tells me. Also, the tobacco itself
isn't very damaging. The amount of tobacco we got was supposed to
last us 2 hours, but it's about the equivalent of 1 cigarette.
The Coffee Bean called me up
today. They want me to come in on Saturday for an
interview. Im most definetely stoked about this. I need a
job and the one I'm working at is walking distance from my house.
I could skate there in 2 minutes! Plus the babes are at an all
time high this time of the year:)
Tommorow I look forward to a most triumphant day of surf bra.
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October 8th, 2004
01:44 pm
Motivation is something you have to
create. I realized it doesn't just happen on its own or doesn't
just miraculously happen when you move to a new state. So far,
finding a job has been my number one priority over anything else.
I feel like I have made a large dent in the job hunting area, but I
somehow feel like I'm not doing something right here. Am I
missing something? Wasn't it always really easy for me to get a
job. I wonder what went wrong here. Today I will try for my
luck and go job hunting in the depths of Los Angeles. Will there
be obstacles? Yes. Will there be flesh eating reptiles?
Yes. Will there be monkies with grenade launchers? Yes, but
that's just a risk I'm going to have to take.
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October 7th, 2004
12:35 pm
Yes my friends. I am living in my
new apartment. Things are looking up. Things are always looking
up even when they are down. There is something I realized about
California. If you can't afford rent ($682/1bedroom) and you don't have
a job, you are fucked. All I can do is laugh. I have been looking for
jobs, but I have also lowered my standards significantly. At first I
wanted to be a waiter or busser, but then I realized that everyone and
their mother wants a job as a waiter around here. I'm looking for jobs
in marketing or returning to the good ol' days of being a barista. I'll
see how that goes. I've been working out a lot and staying
active. Yesterday and the day before we jogged around our apartment
complex (this place is huge mind you). That was neat :) Then a few days
ago I did some weights and went swimming. I've met some cool people for
the most part.
My roommate is slowly pissing me
off. Thinking only for himself. He's hardlined into our internet and im
running wireless which really pisses me off since he made the cable guy
put the modem next to his computer simply for that reason. Im only
running a wireless B card too which aggravates me and means that I
might have to upgrade to a G since we
have a G router. I might just piss him off and hardline into the router with my monster big green cable. lol.
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September 22nd, 2004
01:48 am
I'm going to be perfectly honest. Things havn't been very productive the last couple days here. Thank goodness I get to move into my new place on thursday. I think Fred is at his limit with me and wants some quiet time to himself. I don't blame him.
The tuesdays, $1 6 piece chicken nuggets at McDonalds are Deceitful. To some people, they are good and I admit they are, but when you've had more then the recommended 6 pieces, things get bad, real bad. I ordered two and some fries. I fealt like crap. I can honestly say, you are what you eat. If you eat crap ass food like McDonalds, you feel like a big piece of crap. Do yourself a favor if you are eating this kind of shit on a regular basis, stop now. I realized why i quit eating fast food in the first place. I will give McDonalds credit for marketing that well. They bested me this time, but there wont be a next time. Muwhahaha.
To be continued......
Current Mood: geeky
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September 10th, 2004
12:09 pm
It's so difficult to start off your day, but not knowing where to start. Yesterday and the day before I went job hunting. I want to be a waiter because I think that will be where I'll make the most money. I sent in the applications and resumes to places around where I'm living. Hopefully someone will call me here pretty soon. I want to start working and making money. I don't like to sit around waisting my day.
I think today I might go biking along hermosa beach to manhatten beach. I did this a week ago and it was really fun. You can bike right of LAX airport and watch the planes fly over you. Pretty cool!
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September 8th, 2004
12:57 am
I went job hunting today. I filled out a few applications to some notable restaurants in the farmer's market area. There are some extremely nice restaurants in this area and I hope that there will be some way to convince them that I'm right for the job. I hope I get one in this area too. I went into one of these restaurants and as I was filling out my application, tables were filling up with hot babes. It took me 20 minutes to finish my application in that restaurant.
I drove down to Ottis, a college for clothing designers, with my friend Erica. She drives a beamer and she's from Oregan and she's spoiled rotten and I want her to buy me something. That was off the subject, but the school is in the downtown area. Thankfully we drove there during the day, but its crazy downtown. There are a ton of hispanics. It's literally hispanic town or something. I dont know. Its hard to explain. There are all these restaurants and it's like one gian flee market for hispanics.
Having a girl as a friend is crazy. She's really nice and I can talk to her about anything and she completely understands and relates. Then I can talk to her about girls and get advice. I know it seems really lame to get a friend who is a girl, but after pondering this idea for a few minutes, I came to the conclusion that having one is awesome.
Current Mood: indescribable
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September 4th, 2004
09:30 pm
If anyone knows how to make a work resume, please send me yours so I have something to work off of. send it over to cj_riddell@hotmail.com
Also, I really wanted to give out this link to this AWESOME anime called "Naruto." It's a long series, but BETTER then any JAPANESE/AMERICAN ANIME MOVIE,SERIES I've ever seen. I love it and I'm addicted. So basically what you do is get this program called "bit torrent." It's basically a peer-to-peer sharing program. So, "if you give unto others, they will give unto you." Download it in then go to the link for the animes and click it and follow instructions. The link I send will also have a link to bit torrents on the top of the page called "torrents." It doesn't matter what one you get, just make sure it's compatible with your operating system.
http://animesuki.drwilco.com/series.php/3.html
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07:54 pm
Today I sat at home for a while and debated whether it was really worth going out to do anything. I figured I would make up excuses for not going out and looking for a job. Well, it will be too busy for me to come in and get an interview, I thought to myself. But, I was getting tired of staying inside the house, so I figured why not just go do something, anything. So, I went down to Fairfax and Sunset and picked up a copy of "The Agencies" which is a really good book for actors looking for agents and good advice. Then after that I sat in the car and meditated. Yep, I meditated. My acting coach told me to do this if your head isn't in the right place. I havn't done this in a while and after I did it, I felt great. Seriously, I felt great. I felt confident and nothing bothered me. I didn't get self-counscious at all and everything moved at my pace. A few girls came up and talked to me. They were a little young though, 15. Then I went into a few restaurants and that hostesses were really really nice to me. I know its there job to greet you, but they both introduced themselves and helped me out on getting advice to get a job so it seemed like they wanted me to work there. Anyway, it was an overall good day.
I thought I would share this meditation process with everyone. This was written straight from the source. Sheila Ivy Traister, my acting coach....
1. Picture the Divine source as you know it, or are coming to know it, and ask that you be filled with it's Divine white light that is filled with loving, healing and nurturing energy. Grow this light in your heart and let it move through the whole of your being until your are consumed by the warmth of it's glow. Let it move through your skin and fill the energy field that is your aura.
2. When you've reached the outer edges of your aura smooth it out and place yourself and your entire field into a protective bubble or egg that is itself defined by the blessed white light. Know that only divine love and healing can penetrate the skin of this bubble or egg to reach you and that all unwanted energies are bounced or reflected back to where they came from.
3. When your protection is in place ground yourself into the earth which has the power to support you and to neutralize all negative energy. Feel your hips solid and as a strong base and run grounding chords from it through your legs into the earth. The base and chords can be of any medium you wish. In fact you can try different things to see what works for you, metal, water, rope, wood, rock, roots, spaghetti.... whatever works!
a. Practice cutting and reattaching the chords disconnecting the base as well. Remember that the base is attached to the end of your tail bone and that you can feel it's girth through the width of your hips.
4. Once your protection is up and your grounding chord is in place, release all energies of past, present and future that do not serve you in present time. As you release these energies see, feel and know that the divine white light, filled with love and healing is filling all voids created in your release.
5. When you have finished the release seal off the bottoms of your feet, make sure that your protection bubble is intact and that your grounding chord remains solidly anchored.
6. Now move with confidence into the world around you!
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September 3rd, 2004
07:38 pm
Things just aren't as enjoyable alone. I want to do something right now, but it feels like anything i do will be doing won't be worth doing by myself. Ah well, I guess its better to be doing something by myself then doing nothing by myself. Right?
So, today I did absolutely nothing. I went to the hot tub, then i went into the pool, then i came back upstairs into my room. After watching some TV, I decided I was hungry so I drove around endlessely for about an hour until I came across a Subway. That was about it. Then I came back home, read a little bit and then I got on my computer and wrote this.
Tommorow I'm going to stay busy. If you stay busy, the day goes by a lot faster and you feel like you accomplished something.
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August 18th, 2004
01:41 am
i have two more days at the animal shelter getting all of my community service done before i leave. who would have thought that i was actually leaving. it still hasnt hit me yet. i havnt even packed and im leaving this weekend. whats even worse, i dont really miss my parents now, but i have a feeling i will once i move out there. seriously, none of this is hitting me at all.
working at the animal shelter is unusual work. as my dad puts it, its bitter-sweet. you feel good because your doing this for a good cause, but at the same time its incredibly sad seing the living situations for these animals. ive just been working with cats because im a cat person. ive thought about opening up my own non-killing cat shelter, but im going to make it really nice. the cats are going to have lots of room to play and there will be a big outside area with trees, ledges, and toys to play on. its just an idea and im throwing out there because im hoping i wont forget about it when or if i ever get enough money to start up a place like it. im going to call it Cat Jungle Shelter. or in short CJ shelter!
Current Music: requiem for a dream soundtrack
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August 9th, 2004
11:14 pm
today was fun, infact you could say that it was epic. i went boogy boarding at the golden riv today. i taned a lot, which is always good. then i met up with my bro who ive been spending a lot of quality time with since he found out i was moving to cali for sure. we went wakeboarding around 6 and it was so much fun. people think that getting a boat is a big hassle, but its really not that bad. the kid we went with had us in the water in about 2 minutes and we getting the boat back out of the water in 5 minutes. i really want a boat. the endless possibilities and the babe opportunities are at an all time high with a boat.
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July 12th, 2004
11:40 pm - Time to step it up!!
i watched a movie that inspired me not only on how i want to look but also how i want to approach my life and i didn't even finish watching the entire movie. i watched the movie "Body of Work." it inspired me to gain weight and eventually gain muscle. my goal is to gain 30 lbs. in 12 weeks and i know i can do it. i am currently 6'1" with 150 lbs. i want to get that up to 180 lbs. by the time im finished with this training. i have what you call a hard-gaining body which basically means i have a really fast metabilism and my body burns off calories way too fast before i ever have a chance to gain weight. i now realized why its so difficult for a person like me to notice absolutely nothing when working out because its all about the diet. what i eat is probably going to be one of the most essential aspects in actually gain weight. i will have to eat 6 meals a day that require me to eat lots of protein and fats.
tonight i went home and picked up this awesome link to gaining weight for people who have hard-gaining bodies. this person who has set up this entire booklet is not a phony. i saw this guy in this movie called "Body of Work." he was literally looked like a skeleton before working out and now he looks amazingly fit.
www.musclegaintips.com
i've never really applied myself to something for a long period of time. just like training my body i will have to train my mind. i know it will be hard and i might make up excuses such as ADD, etc. but i no longer want to use those excuses as a way out of my problems. i dont even know if i have ADD. i self-diagnosed myself with it. for all i know, im just lazy and choose to not focus. its no surprise that i end up getting a car called a Focus and for a good reason. because thats exactly what i need to do, focus. i will do this. im determined in my mind. but like all things, actions speak louder then words. i must follow this guideline to the tee. im going to buy it wednesday as soon as i get up enough money. this has become number one priority before going out to LA. i want to have a large amount of confidence and not be afraid to show everyone who i am.
Current Mood: determined
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June 28th, 2004
02:44 am - great movie
i saw Farenheit 911 tonight. this movie was a big wake up call for everyone. it was about time somebody showed the truth and spoke out for the democrats or for all of us who knew that Bush was up to no good. all i can say is, "i told you so." i pretty much expressed some of the same basic ideals as Micheal Moore before he released this film and now these theories have been proven. i love it. i can't wait to see Bush out of office. the only problem now is hoping that the vote system won't be rigged for Bush again like it was for Gore. The corporation that makes the voting system possible, unfortunately, is owned by republicans so its possible that they could sway the vote again. its bullshit. if that happens im moving out of the country. i won't sit around while they instill a draft that could send me to my death for a pointless war that's being faught over for greedy politicians who want oil. i would much rather move to Canada then live in the U.S. with Bush in office. he puts a bad name on the U.S. i dont know if anyone realizes this or not, but no one likes us. Ireland had a huge protest against the war and Bush. Not too long ago Spain spoke out against the war and many other countries are following. if we honestly think this war is helping the Iraqi people, think again. why would they still attack us if they want us to help them? why would they protest and leave U.S. corpses hanging from poles if they wanted us to help them? simple answer, they dont want us to help them. they want us out. our government disgusts me and i can't wait for Kerry to come into office.
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June 26th, 2004
03:36 pm
This will be my first entry in what seems like ages. i have had little or no time at all to write in this and frankly ive been meaning to write things in here for a long time now, but i have nothing of great importance to say now. i hate that. i have all these intersting things i want to say when im too busy to write here and when i can, i have nothing to say. nothing.
gotta go to work.
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May 25th, 2004
02:35 am
i read gary's journal entry about the war. blah, blah, blah. im not trashing his opinion or his beliefs, but politics is such a waste of time. its so pointless to get into arguments because not one side is better then the other. the liberal side will say that conservatives are gun toting nazis and the conservatives will say that the liberals are tree hugging hippy pussies. whatever the case, its pointless to get into politics unless you can honestly contribute something other then just bashing the other side of a political viewpoint.
in any argument, if you stand as a person who is a liberal, then you'll always be a liberal and you'll constantly find ways to defend your arguments. if you stand as a conservative you will also find ways to in which to defend your arguments. but to me, its just pointless. all it involves is constant bickering and a colossal hate for the opposite side. i guess basically what im trying to say is, why get into any argument cause it aint gonna make a damn difference. if your liberal your a liberal. if your a conservative your a conservative. its pointless to try to convince the other side why your more right then the other.
and for all those who feel that the other side is full of idiots who have no intelligent retort, im sorry to say but you are incredibly ignorant. in a nation where there are just about the same amount of republicans as democrats, i would say that it wouldnt be hard to pin-point at least one person from about 50% of the population of the united states who has a reasonable argument for his beliefs on his political bias.
im sure that a week from now, ill be off arguing some more about my political beliefs so i guess you could say that im a hypocrit, but i still think its pointless to argue your points to the opposite political viewpointee. there's some of my jibber-jabba for the day.
gary, before you leave, give me your password to maximumgamer
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May 5th, 2004
01:15 am - time to update
here is the quote everyone wants...
"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature nor do children as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeated."
Helen Keller - Let us have faith (1941)
wow, life is fun when your busy. you feel like your not wasting your time and it makes you feel a lot more mature and for me, focused.
today was grand. ATVs were steezed as could be. those things are so much fun, especially if they are rear wheel drive. i forgot how much fun it is to hang out with the group. there was a small period where i just didnt hang out with them for forever. i know i simply over-reacted about the thing dan and i had going. i know that i had a reason to be upset, but i definetely could have been a little more relaxed about the whole situation. oh well. its the past and i shouldnt worry about the past. i should focus on this second that im typing this paper right now. i love the group. im super stoked to go camping on thursday.
i really need some sleep. i can't wait to sleep in tommorow. mmmm....sleep
Current Music: TV on the Radio
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April 11th, 2004
06:44 pm
im really annoyed right now. my car was all jacked up today. one of the spark plugs popped out and made this really wierd rattling noise. derrick and his dad are awesome. right when i pulled up in the driveway, derrick and his dad got in there and found the problem and fixed it like it aint no thing but a chicken wing.
how crazy is it that i already know what i want to do. i already know what im good at and what talents i posess. however, its strange how many people have no idea what they want to do. this occured to me while reading dan's journal. the one thing that frustrated me about it was his negative attitude, saying that he had no talents. and its not just dan either. there are so many people out there who have no idea what they want to do, but once you start degrading yourself and thinking negatively about yourself and doubting yourself, then how can your move forward? how can you push yourself in the right direction?
there is one thing that you can do. you can find out what it is that you love to do and then you can branch off a bunch of different things from there. for instance.
i like...
videogames - i could be a video game tester, maker, developer, writer, etc.
movies - critic, director
work on computers - design a new type of hardware, start a shop, program, etc.
Girls - be a porn star:)
the possibilities are endless, but first you have to come up with the interest of trying it. make sure its something that you enjoy. something thats fun and brings you joy. then try it. thats the only way you know if you have a talent in it. you find your talents by trying new things. i didnt know i was going to be a good actor, i just tryed it one day and BAM, im really good at this sheez:)
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/angry.gif) aggravated
Current Music: Living Legends
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shaggy_04's journal